I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
