Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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