I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I just found puke in my bra..
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize