let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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