I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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