So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
