Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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