You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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