The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
