Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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