he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
