recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
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