I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
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