Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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