Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Randomize
