it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
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