Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
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