why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
