I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
