There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
bring money and cleavage
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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