don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
