I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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