i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize