go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize