Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
