It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
so let's talk penis.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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