hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize