Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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