I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
