is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Randomize
