fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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