I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Randomize
