Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
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