you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
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It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
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I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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