this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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