I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
