I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
