The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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