Will you blow on my dice?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
you told grandpa to call you daddy
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Randomize
