you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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