I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
No subtext here. People are naked.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
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