god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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