Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
