dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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