i permit you to call me
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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