oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Text me some of your sweat
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize