playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
