We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
