you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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