I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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