Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm getting married
To pizza
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
